Progress NOT Perfection — Being “Flawsome” in the New Year
The New Year brings new opportunities…to resurrect some old messages in our heads.
I’m NOT!
I’m not…good enough, skinny enough, healthy enough, productive enough, rich enough, beautiful enough, smart enough, spiritual enough or successful enough. I’m not…a good enough person, parent, spouse, employee, neighbor, Christian or friend.
You want to know my response? WHO says?
My experience is, I often measure myself by some unattainable metric of perfection in life. Anything short of that, well it means that I am less than. My New Year’s message to me foremost, and then to those I love and do life with is simple. “It’s about progress NOT perfection. And so be gentle with yourself in the new year.”
Fear and the messages of not being good enough or measuring up to some marketed societal norm can be debilitating, often leaving us with feelings of emptiness or even worse, contemptuous of what others have that we don’t.
This past year our family has become a fan of the writings of author Shauna Niequist. She has written several excellent books. Her book Present Over Perfect was a gift to our kids this past year. We love her messages of simplicity and her encouragement to abandon the seduction of perfection. On New Year’s we read some excerpts from her book to provide some footing for the new year.
In her book, Bittersweet: Thoughts on Change, Grace, and Learning the Hard Way — she writes, “The grandest seduction of all is the myth that DOING EVERYTHING BETTER gets us where we want to be. It gets us somewhere, certainly, but not anywhere worth being.”
I am coming to believe that all too often “perfection is the enemy of progress” and that “great is the enemy of good”. In our striving for perfection we often lose our way. In our striving to be great we often lose what is truly good.
The results are always corroding and sometimes even catastrophic. In his book Shrink: Faithful Ministry in a Church Growth Culture author and pastor Tim Suttle writes, “The drive to be great—to be a success by the standards of the world—often crowds out the qualities of goodness, virtue, and faithfulness that should define the central focus of Christian leadership. In the culture of today’s church, successful leadership is often judged by what works, while persistent faithfulness takes a back seat.”
So as we enter 2017, I don’t want to trounce on well intentioned resolutions or New Year’s goals. I do however want to remind us all that we are enough in the eyes of a loving Father God. “But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners.” ~ Romans 5:8 NLT
God loves us and thinks we’re awesome even with all of our flaws!
The Urban Dictionary recently added a new term, “flawsome” — describing something that is awesome because of and including its flaws. And that sounds like a good word for us in this new year — flawsome!
So on life’s journey and as we cross the threshold of 2017, remember it’s progress and NOT perfection. And to be gentle with yourself (and others) all along the way — and remember, your FLAWSOME!
Happy New Year!
Jim
